BOSTON-Dave Haplert, a self described "die hard member of Red Sox nation," brought his knowledge of the team's roster, as well as his ability to tell Asian people apart, into question, when he confused Red Sox middle reliever Hideki Okajima for starting pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka. "Come on Daisuke, put him over!" Halpert yelled, nearly spilling his fifth beer all over everyone sitting in front of him. "Strike him out, Dice-K! Throw the gyropitch!" Halpert's confusion reached a fever pitch when the Red Sox put in another of their Asian relievers, Takashi Saito, to close out the game. "Hey, Dice-K, stay in one place goddamit! Hiding in the outfield..." Halpert's two friends who accompanied him to the game could not be reached for comment, as they had already snuck away to a different seating section sometime around the 5th inning.
-- Daniel Strauss
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